The silence of children during family gatherings may seem normal and is often interpreted as a sign of politeness and respect, as is customary in our traditional culture. However, today, amidst rapid societal changes, we must reconsider this silence, as it can hide deeper psychological and social dimensions.
But before jumping to conclusions, we should first ask: Is this silence old and deeply rooted, or is it a recent, cumulative behavior? This question is a key to proper understanding and response.
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Discomfort or Social Anxiety
In some cases, silence results from a child’s discomfort—perhaps due to the presence of a certain person at the gathering, or a general unease with family occasions, especially given social distancing that has reduced family interactions. The solution here is to create a balanced environment in the family gathering, considering age groups and the level of discussion, so everyone feels included and comfortable without marginalization or embarrassment.
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Fear or Social Phobia
Silence may mask a psychological disorder like social phobia, which requires intervention by mental health professionals, especially if the silence is severe and persistent. Such signs should not be underestimated, as mental health deserves the same attention as physical health.
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Shyness and Selective Mutism
Excessive shyness can lead a child to what is known as “selective mutism,” where they choose to remain silent in specific social settings. It is important to gradually support children to break through shyness, starting with one-on-one conversations and then slowly expanding the social circle until they develop confidence and openness.
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Hidden Worries or Silent Traumas
When silence suddenly appears in a person who is normally social by nature, it usually signals a troubling issue. The child might have experienced harmful events such as bullying, harassment, extortion, depression, fights, or even legal problems hidden from the family. In such cases, it is crucial to engage in empathetic and supportive dialogue rather than blame or reproach.
